try to squeeze a drop of blood...from a sugarcube

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piggnaw
A days have become my reason for living. Helen, Merishna, and Jessica are amazing and I'm still trying to decide what evil forces kept us from interacting in the past. Maybe it was for the good of the world, because in all honesty, we do some pretty awful things.

A few days ago after nourishing our bodies with some delicious chick-fil-a we decided to attempt visiting the local sex shop, the very appropriately titled, love shack. We got about three feet inside and Merishna and I were feigning interest in trashy lingerie that looked like it had been had dragged out of the 80's, when the hag who was running the fine establishment asked us for some ID. The only person who had their license was Merishna and she certainly didn't want to stay in there alone (no matter how huge the dildo's were or how hot the male employees were) so we had to leave. From there we went to Jessica's house to gawk at her hot room mate ( WHOM WE DUBBED "SQUIRTY" FOR REASONS THAT SHALL REMAIN SECRET). He was italian and short and his screename has "DA PIMP" in it. I drew gay porn in MS Paint and he called me immature. Okay, DAPIMP3000, whatever you say. I managed to not break my neck jumping on her trampoline and I even scored a caprisun. Then I went home to wallow in hours of seinfeld and cheese nips.

Today was equally exciting as we went on a tobacco binge. Can you imagine pulling up next to a car full of teenage girls, each fully equipped with a huge cigar and singing along to Ashlee Simpson? I think we went to three separate 7-11s and succeeded in consuming two tiny cherry cigars and one huge chocolate one. We named it "the communal cigar of sisterhood" or something, but I'm pretty sure that's a misnomer considering I'm the only one who really smoked it. I got to say fun things like "SMOKE THAT FATTY" and "YOU WANNA SUCK ON THIS GAR?". Old people thought it was a great idea to stare at us and the lady who was working at the 7-11 called us "sweety" and "honey" when they asked for ID. I had a free sample of a sandwich that tasted like ass and some more chick-fil-a. We corrupted Helen and made her join us in our chain smoking sin fest. Eventually we had to return Merishna to school so that she wouldn't get in trouble for skipping and then I returned home to continue my quest of downloading music. I accidentally deleted all of my music. Yo La Tengo, GONE. Elvis Costello, GONE. The Smiths, GONE. All I have left is shipbuilding and some coldplay stuff. I should have probably started a new paragraph a few sentences ago huh?

I guess I'll just close by mentioning something about how I fell asleep in webster's class and woke up to the penis of a small child and a bloody carcass that was being raped and ravaged. Also, I really hate Le Tigre and I don't care what they stand for because their music makes my ears bleed. People who think that one band can define your stance on feminism are nothing short of moronic. You don't have to like them to be a part of the women's progressive movement and you don't have to be part of said movement just because you like them. This isn't going out to anyone in particular, I've just seen a whole lot of stupid websites. Want to listen to something with genuine feminist undertones? Zak and Sara by Ben Folds, don't understand? I'd be more than happy to offer up an explanation. This is the longest entry of my life I'm going to go smoke one of the remaining menthols in my purse and pray that I die of lung cancer instead of being hit by a bus or something.


WHAT YOU WEAR

1. Do you wear spike bracelets? haha not since 9th grade
2. Do you wear jelly bracelets? only my two favorite ones, okay
3. Do you wear converse? constantly
4. Do you wear black nailpolish? see above, sigh im not goth i swear
5. Do you wear band t-shirts? Yes
6. Do you wear skateboard companies? I have a bam shirt, but I only bought it because I thought the irony of it saying "BAM" across my boobs was hilarious.
7. Do you wear surfing companies? I think I have a roxie shirt from the days of old
8. Do you wear dirtbike companies? fdsafdsalj no
9. Do you wear striped shirts? eh
10. Do you wear solid polo shirts? nope
11. Do you wear chokers? that one that i never ever take off
12. Do you wear lock necklaces? No
13. Does it take you five minutes or less to do your hair? Okay I don't even do my hair, thank god for hats and scunchies
14. Do you wear lots of eyeliner? WHAT IS MAKEUP?
15. Do you use a backpack or messenger bag? messenger bag, THESE ANSWERS ARE MAKING ME SICK
16. Do you wear darker colors? NO I WEAR ONLY THE COLORS OF THE RAINBOW
17. Do you wear neon colors? I'm sorry, is it 1989???
18. Do you wear 'whats in' or stick with your old jeans? I just wear jeans, I don't really care what they look like. I have one pair that ripped when I fell running to the bus. sigh, my life.
19. Do you wear sweatshirts and jeans? oh my god all the time
20. Do you wear knee socks? SOB YES but only because I bought a ton of them in 9th grade when something gave me the idea that they were really awesome and not incredibly stupid.

WHAT YOU HAVE

21. Do you have character shoe laces? No
22. Do you have drumsticks but dont play? No
23. Do you have guitar pics but dont play? all over my room, because my brother leaves them all over the fucking place.
24. Do you have the Nightmare Before Christmas on tape or DVD? that movie is awful
25. Do you have the Breakfast Club on tape or DVD? never seen it.
26. Do you have 16 Candles or Pretty in Pink on tape or DVD? I love the first one.
27. How many CD's do you own? Seriously, like 20. I condone piracy.
28. How many DVD's do you own? eh...only 15 that are genuinely mine, the rest are public domain.
29. How many tapes do you own? back, odelay
30. How many piercings do you have? 6, I have both of my ears pierced twice, my cartilage, and my bellybutton.
31. How many tattoos do you have? None YET

HABITS

32. Do you write your name a million different ways on 1 blank sheet of paper? Only when I'm thinking up last names that are better than STONE (FYE THERE ARE ABOUT TEN MILLION)
33. Do you draw a lot of pictures of hearts? obviously
34. Is the volume on anything that plays music in your house really loud? sigh my mom listens to bing crosby on her Ipod as loud as she can play it.
35. Do you stay up late to watch Invader Zim? no
36. Do you sing out of key purposely when you're hyper? I only sing out of key on purpose when I've already messed up a part of the song on accident, then I continue messing up to make it look intentional.
37. When a song comes on you like do you rock out? haha sometimes I skank to Catch 22
38. Do you push buttons multiple times? Yes
39. Do you draw with white out on a lot of stuff? No
40. Do you color your nails with sharpies? No
41. Do you sit there listening to songs and relate the lyrics to your life? Yes
42. Do you pick one song and learn all the lyrics? mmm songmeanings.com
43. Do you daydream a lot? constantly
44. Do you share lockers with your friends? I share with the boyf
45. Are you distracted by shiny objects? only if it's money, because I'm a greedy, greedy jew.
46. Do you know where every sharp object is in your house? nope
47. Do you play DDR constantly? not as much as i should
48. Do you write on your skin with pen? eh, sometimes
49. Do you bite your nails? I wish I did because clipping them is a pain in the ass
50. Do you update your xanga daily? ew who uses xanga
51. Do you have more guy then girl friends? yeah, probably
52. Watch FUSE 24/7? um what is that
53. Do you have a favorite pillow? Yup
54. Do you have oversized stuffed animals? I have this one oversized badger that I stole from zak
55. Are you secretly in love with your friends older brother? not that I know of
56. Do you play with lighters? NO THAT IS MERISHNAS JOB APPARENTLY

D0 YOU WANT TO ...

57. Be in a mosh pit? the last time i was in a mosh pit i got elbowed in the mouth and bled for like a half an hour and Josh was freaking out and wouldn't let me back in, but obviously, YES.
58. Go to a party your parents would never approve of? sure
59. Go to Warped Tour? HAHAHAHA NOPE
60. Run away from home? Nahhh
61. Tell everyone off? mhhhmmm
62. Go to California with someone you love? NEW FUCKING YORK
63. Have a practical president for once? as if you guys didn't know
64. Make peace with an enemy? I don't have any enemies...sigh
65. Make out with someone from a band? YES I WANT TO MAKEOUT WITH SOMEONE FROM THE CULTURE CLUB
66. Buy out Pac Sun or Hot Topic? yes id have so much money.


And I think only two of you would find this funny, but I accidently posted this in THAT OTHER JOURNAL THAT I HAVE.

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I don't do memes. Not ever. Well maybe once.

My god. And you want to trade lives with me?

Haha, your "other journal". I don't even read those anymore, boo. <3333

Dude, I was really fucking bored. Memes are good for temporary entertainment. Yes, I'd love to trade lives with you because your job entails watching hours and hours of malcolm in the middle, how amazing.

sigh my other journal misses your other journal.

LMAO your other journal sigh. What the hell you were listening to Ashlee Simpson, please tell me what song and if you say LALA i will dump you right now. Nice survey stealer and p fucking s i dont think anything is worse than having the last name JOHNSON. it reminds everyone of a penis.

sdfgjgkldfgj GAY PORN

It wasn't la la I'm pretty sure it was pieces of me and it was just the song that happened to be playing OKAY. I wish my last name was fellatio or something.

damn girl, you smokin cigars? pretty peeeeemp!

I know right, you want me to hook you up biatttttttch

would you like to lick my gar.... no ill just suck on it

fdasfdsa sigggggh I still have that fatty in my purse okay

damn i didnt even see this till today. but i agree. tobacco binges and chik-fil-a..what more does a girl need?? besides a doc johnson. but seriously we need to do this more.

i hate you and your fucking church creeps. WHY ARENT WE HANGING OUT RIGHT NOW.

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